Let Us Introduce Ourselves

People ask why we’ve created an exclusionary dating site. This is a valid question that deserves a valid answer.

“Why limit the dating experience to only certain races? Isn’t that, in itself, racist?”

Sisters and White Misters doesn’t discriminate on the basis of color. Anyone is welcome to join the group. However, we offer our services primarily to these pairings because it can be difficult for black women and white men to connect through more generalized dating sites. 

Black women who are attracted to white men are often criticized both by black men and by other black women. They may have a difficult time finding a mate, as racial preferences often go unanswered on dating sites. When preferences are disclosed, they’re often at the bottom of the profile and can thus provide a hurtful realization to a sister who has already read through it and felt a connection. Sisters and White Misters offers a space for black women to converse with white men without having to wonder if the men will discredit them based on their race.

White men who are attracted to black women face equal difficulties. Going into a dating situation, a man doesn't know if a black woman prefers men of her own race, and a white man interested in black women may be considered “creepy” or of having a “Massa” complex. While same race dating is a completely valid choice, interracial dating is just as valid. In fact, we question whether innate attraction is really a choice at all.

“What’s the big deal? Interracial dating is so common now.”

At our first event, an African woman came on her own. “Mrs. X”, as we’ll call her, met Mr. X at a gas station in Central California. She is very dark with beautiful dreadlocks that cascade down her back. Mr. X is a light-skinned white man from Germany. The two fell in love, but their journey has not been without prejudice from others. 

Mr. and Mrs. X often receive disapproving glances from passersby. Sometimes black men will come up to Mrs. X and call her a traitor to her race. Mrs. X joined the group because she wants a safe place where her choice of partner is not a subject of speculation or ridicule, and where she can simply be one of the crowd. After the first event, Mr. X joined her and they’re able to be physically affectionate without wondering if those in their company will be offended by their relationship.

“What if I’m attracted to all kinds of men/women?”

Our site is for certain races of certain sexes to find each other, but we know that attraction often exists on a broad spectrum. Sisters and White Misters helps facilitate one kind of connection, but it does not propose that black women / white men pairings are better than any other type.

“So what’s the bottom line?”

 Sisters and White Misters brings together people with similar interests, just as many other dating services. There are groups for outdoor enthusiasts, wine tasters, and gamers. While Sisters and White Misters was designed specifically for white men and black women to meet, it is not an exclusionary group. Our mission is to bring people together, not to alienate them. Through creating a space for interracial dating without judgment, we’re supporting integration, not exclusion.

Check out our group here.

Yours in Love,
Shannon